Thursday, March 29, 2012

What's Your Song? Thursday Link Up!

Today we are headed out with a friend to spend some time at SpeedZone. During the month of your birthday, you can get 4 hours of unlimited racing. Definitely a great reason to love having our birthdays in the same month! In consideration of all the butt I'll be kicking this evening, I felt it was only appropriate to have a great theme song to go with it. Even though I always think of fighter jets and a sexy Tom Cruise (who happens to look like my uncle in that movie - does that make me creepy?) when I hear it, can't you just imagine racing to this?

Join us on this great link-up from Amber at Goodnight Moon!

Wednesday, March 28, 2012

March Madness = Birthday Madness

March is the birthday month in my family. The hubby, my dad, my stepmother, hubby's aunt, hubby's g'ma and myself are March babies. My sister and hubby's g'pa might as well be, theirs are at the end of February. Being completely broke, we didn't do much this year. I sent birthday wishes. For my birthday, my sister came to our side of the world and we went out for Mexican food. Food was pretty good, no alcohol in the margaritas, and services was TERRIBLE. I wrote a review on = that bad. But it was fun to be out with my sister and hubby. My birthday gifts were really more for the pets than for me, but I am totally cool with that. Spike has given a new, larger kennel and we got a gift certificate to Petsmart. We spent it on new goodies for all the birds and the dog. They were happy. We figured out that rawhide = doggie ritalin. We've been able to let Spike hang out in the living room a lot more than normal because he will lay quietly for hours on a pillow with a good rawhide. It's fantastic.
 For the hubby's bday, we did whatever he wanted. We visited a friend to pick up his new cd: Self-titled album by BONEYMEAN. We fell in love with an apartment. We ended with movie night at home - free coupon for Redbox, popcorn, beer and soda. We rented Happy Feet 2. Very cute. Hubby loved it and ended up enjoying a day he was dreading for a week prior. We went to the Japanese Gardens the next day and spent 3 hours wandering around. Hubby bought me that cute frog necklace from the gift shop 'just cuz' :) I'm sure I've mentioned before that I LOVE FROGS. let me repeat. I LOVE FROGS. And yet I don't have a frog tattoo. Too hard to pick just one, I guess.

We're planning at least two more trips to the Gardens in the next few weeks. I'm looking forward to more photo ops and easy exercise - maybe even a picnic lunch!

Thursday, March 8, 2012

What's Your Song? Thursday link up!

I'm actually on my computer today, surprise! Since I started losing the ability to use my fingers, I have drastically reduced the duration and frequency of my PC usage. Ok, well that and my laptop has been without a power cord for several months now, so I have to go upstairs, away from the hubby, to use it. Sorry blog readers - my hubby is more important than my blog :)

I get to do a What's Your Song? linkup with Amber at Goodnight Moon! Yay :) This week I picked an oldie - and I'm not dedicating it to a person, it's being dedicated to all my food allergies lol. I had a setback in my eating changes, so I needed a pick me up, a fighting song, something to keep me going. And who better than Gloria Gaynor?

Join us on this great link-up from Amber at Goodnight Moon!

Wednesday, March 7, 2012

Attempting to roll with the punches - but eventually won't I get knocked out?

Life with no jobs and multiple disabilities is difficult enough. But to add insult to injury, our apartment complex has decided to raise our rental price over $100, should we decide to renew our lease. Well this apartment is falling apart. The doors leak when it rains, there is no bathroom downstairs, the kitchen has no counter space, and there's really just not the right kind of room for our needs. So we put in our notice to leave. We really weren't left with much of a choice - my grandparents are paying the rent right now, and it's not fair to raise the rent on them. I made the mistake of touring a rental house on Sunday that is just barely outside our budget. It really is the PERFECT place. It's a 3 bedroom, 1 bath home with a nice kitchen, plenty of storage, fabulous hardwood floors, a great yard for the dog, and lots of potential to be our first real home. But how on Earth are we going to convince the landlord to pick us as tenants when we have no income? My grandfather is going to have to at least co-sign on a lease because there is no way that our lives are going to magically get 200% better before the end of April.

Some days are much worse than others. I backslid on my diet horribly yesterday and today. I ate so many things I was allergic to, just because I couldn't bring myself to get anything done. It's a very depressing situation at home right now, and I'm having trouble believing that things are going to get better anytime soon. The people who can afford to help us are the ones who haven't once called or texted to see how we are. Of course, I could call them. But for the past 15 years, that side of my family has had the belief that phone calls are a two-way street, but never treated them as such. Why should I always be expected to make contact, when their fingers aren't broken? The hubby's mother attempted to use the line 'You changed your phone number so I didn't know how to get a hold of you' once, and I let her have it. We've had the same numbers since 2010. It's 2012 now, bitch. You know the number. My grandfather forwarded an email I sent him a couple of months ago regarding my thoughts on suicide to my father. Have I received a text or call? Nope. Of course, this is the same father that when I decided to cut myself in high school said if I ever did it again, he'd have no choice but to take me to a psychologist. The first time wasn't enough, so I'd have to do it again? Let's ignore the fact that I'd attempted several times before the cutting, and nothing was ever done. I've grown up a lot since then, and know suicide isn't the answer, but wouldn't it be nice to know that someone in the family cares enough to worry about suicidal comments?

Things were starting to look up last week, before we got the notice about the rental increase. I was eating better, losing weight, and really trying to stay positive. But like I've said for years - Murphy's law really should be changed to Lynne's Law - because everything that could go wrong for me has, and continues to.
And what makes this even worse? I'm afraid that something may be very wrong with the hubby. Whenever he goes out to do something, he always comes back with these fantastical stories about run-ins with cops, rude drivers, etc. I've always been curious about all the stories, because these crazy things NEVER happen when I'm around. Every once in a while I'll hear something that contradicts what he has said, or find someone associated with a story that cannot corroborate it. I'm deathly afraid that he is blacking out and his mind is making up these stories. If so, what is he doing when this happens? Does it cause potential problems when driving? Could he black out and drive into oncoming traffic? I honestly have no idea where to turn with this situation. My mom understands and shares my concern, but what are we to do? He's been like this since I met him - but his family is so full of crap that I wouldn't know who to believe if they gave me conflicting stories. I've expressed my concern with the hubby and he seems genuinely concerned about how it is affecting me, but not so much how it affects him. At one point I just thought he was doing a lot of daydreaming - he'd honestly believe that he had completed housework only to realize later that nothing had been done. We tried some methods to help him remember to do things, like post-it notes on the door and such. Those worked while I was working. When I stopped working and was home all the time, all the concerns went away because I was with him and could see when he was or wasn't getting something done. Then the stories about what happened while he ran errands started showing up, and the problem has begun all over again. As a pessemist, all I can think about are the bad things this might be. Does he have multiple personality disorder? Maybe a tumor? Is he hiding abuse in the past? I just don't know, and don't have any clue as to how to explain this to a doctor - let alone know what kind of doctor to take him to.
I'm looking forward to Friday evening- I'm going to the symphony with my mom for my birthday, and for a couple of hours I can forget everything and enjoy the music. Hopefully the world won't fall apart while I'm there.

Sunday, March 4, 2012

Food allergy update

A week and a half ago I found out about my 29 food allergies. The very next day I changed the way I looked at food. That test was exactly what I needed to change my life. When you have a severe allergy like peanuts, you know you have to stay away from them in any form unless you want to die. I never had allergies like that, so I thought I could eat anything I wanted. Now my allergies won't cause ER-worthy allergic reactions, but they still cause problems. I don't look at them as sensitivities - "oh I can eat this every once in a while just not often". I consider them full-blown, I'll die if I eat them allergies, and it has worked fabulously. I've had french fries in my lap with no desire to eat them. I've drooled over cheese without succumbing to so much as a bite. I haven't so much as eaten a Lara Bar now that I know I can't eat dates. Even when shopping at Big Lots last night, if the package had something on my bad list, I put it up. There wasn't any thought on how I could deal with it, I just put it up.

Why am I excited about this? Because I still haven't been working out and I've lost 5 pounds. I feel I should have a party to celebrate. This has literally changed my life. I know it's only been a week and a half, but any other time I have changed my diet, I failed early on in the first week.

And the high-dose fish oil I've been taking for a little over a month is starting to work. I have more energy throughout the day, my brain isn't so foggy, and in general I feel better. Yes, the food is helping. But I was taking the fish oil to relieve inflammation, and the lifestyle change is doing that as well. Although my fingers are still swollen and painful, I'm hopeful that things will change.

I know my candida cleanse is working because I'm dealing with the 'Candida Die Off' symptoms. Things are getting worse before they get better because the candida is dying and flooding my system with toxins. But unlike a lot of people who give up at this point, I'm seeing this through to the end. To assist in the removal of the extra toxins, I'm going to start oil pulling today. I found flavored sunflower oil at Big Lots last night - I think that will make oil-pulling easier.

On a non-health-related note - We are house shopping today. Our apartment lease is up in 2 months and they have decided to increase our rent amount by over $100, so we're moving. We are looking at rental homes instead of apartments so the dog can have a yard, I can have a garden, and my kitchen might actually be useful. I'm hoping to find a place that has a 3rd bedroom I can use as a yoga studio/meditation room/gym. So wish us luck!

Details about candida die-off: